"“Janet Janet Janet and Janet”
So the rumour is out for Gamble. She's not a pole dancer, she is a stripper according to Janet. I'd like to know when she was hosting those sex parties and why I wasn't invited. Poor darling, accused of being a stripper. I find it interesting that I've never been accused of being a stripper. I'm sure my body shape has something to do with it.
I decided to catch up with Janet and hadn't seen her since we were at Chadstone. She was hoping that we would have a nice coffee together and that we could put behind us all that nonsense with Gamble. Not sure what that nonsense was between her and I, I don't recall any nonsense but clearly she had an idea when she came to meet me that something had happened between us.
Janet was very quick to explain that Chyka had heard these rumours and that she probably should've shut her mouth. That's interesting because that was the point I was trying to make to Janet right from the start of the conversation. Janet felt like she was being interrogated and was in a court room, clearly she has never been in a court room with me. I’ve known her for a long time and know that sometimes she gets herself into a bit of trouble by saying too much. Apparently we have 'roles' in this situation and Janet was quick to enquire what my role was. Perhaps I should ask her the same question about Jackie?
Having been on the receiving end of Janet's gossip in the past, I can relate to how Gamble might be feeling and was determined to make sure that, unlike my situation, she wasn't going to have to deal with it on her own. I was hoping to nip it in the bud. Trying to resolve the problem with Janet was like keeping tabs on a scoreboard. And just when I thought it was a waste of time, she decided to start the entertainment by mimicking me. Deck of cards you say? Janet if you're going to try and copy me, at least have the right attitude girl! No prizes for seconds.
Cut to Chyka and Bruce thriving on a different type of energy and drama. Gotta love that. Don't stuff it up guys.
Jackie and Janet preparing their wardrobe for a golf day. Shorts and long socks?! Yikes! I'm in trouble. Jackie's hoping to rock it in a cardigan and seeks confirmation from the sales guy who's waiting to put through a sale but not until Janet has her teary moment with Jackie who has all the answers in the universe. Clearly Janet is upset that I told her that she shouldn't tell the truth. Perhaps she was crying because she wasn't telling the truth and suggested that I was trying to make Gamble more upset with her. What the ... where was I when that conversation happened?
The poor sales guy was as confused looking on at Janet and Jackie hugging (lets just call them 'Jacket') as I am watching that scene. Ohhhh its great to have someone in your corner who always RSVP's to your pity party. So now the objective of the golf day is for 'Jacket' to put this nonsense with Gamble to bed.
Back to reality, loved meeting with Maurice Rinaldi. Not the first time I've done a photo shoot with Maurice and every time he asks me to take my dress off so I thought I'd get in there quick and remind him that it's not going to happen. The plan was to shoot for publicity but the photos he took have been used on the cover of my autobiography, "Fearless". Not quite Playboy but love his work. Typical boy, loves his cars, and typical girl I can't work out what type of car it is. You say Monaro, I say Torana. Whatever it is, it wasn't working. Elephant on a Torana, not quite Playboy shots.
Club 74 and Jackie's stressed for her friend Janet... hmmm she's not the only one stressed out for a friend. Wonder what Jackie's role is. Yum I'm getting hungry.
Helicopter to Moonah Links. Gamble in shorts and socks, there’s the dress code! I have as many socks and shorts in my wardrobe as I do tracksuits. No point in looking like I can play when I can't even hang on to the golf club. But the first challenge is getting my high heels off. The second challenge is being in a golf buggy with Chyka who is driving with two left feet. Whiplash and we're on our way. Not a very sporting crew.
Friction, friction, friction and friction. The elephant on the golf course plants itself firmly in the middle of all the girls, but somehow we all manage to kiss and make up. The question is, for how long?
Words of wisdom from Jackie the peace maker, finally worked out her role, funny how she can talk about it but no one else is allowed to. Great news Janet. If she hears anything about any of us, she is not going to tell us. Perfect."
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The Real Housewives of Melbourne airs Sunday nights at 8:30pm on Arena and Thursday nights at 9pm/8c on Bravo!
Photo Credit: Arena