Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author (Good Tea), and they do not reflect in any way those of iRealHousewives.com.
The ladies are still in Berlin but LVP had to fly back to Los Angeles to receive an award for some dog thing. Eh. I'm just happy there was one less bitch on the trip. Kyle and Teddi waited for Erika Jayne to meet them at the Berlin zoo for over 40 minutes. Normally you would expect that that time would be taken to prepare an epic EJ look, but she was late because she was sick and didn't serve us the realness that anyone expected. Why didn't Teddi pop off at Erika for being late like she did to Dorito? I think it's more than obvious that Little Miss Mellencamp shits herself everytime that Erika "Ice Queen" Jayne walks past. Seriously I think I saw the faeces fall out of her when Erika arrived. Being an ice queen still makes her a queen and that's more than I can say for Teddi.
While those ladies explored the zoo, Dorito and Rinna attended the spa together. The sad thing about this franchise is that you can tell the women aren't really friends. It almost seems like they are all on their own islands and are just mere acquaintances and can't be bothered to get too deep or invested in a friendship or be honest because they know it could lead to conflict and none of them want to show us their bad sides. I'm bored and these bitches need a shakeup.
In true Beverly Hills vacation tradition the Housewives went on a boat but this ride didn't even compare to reality TV excellence that we witnessed when the ladies took to the seas in Hong Kong, Amsterdam or even Dubai. Maybe it's because LVP and her shit stirring ass weren't on board. Teddi, the only reasonable and sensible one of the group, was confused if the ladies were attending a costume party or were sight seeing and I guess with this show every scene is a costume party. Ugh. This is why I love New York so much more because they are real people who don't travel with 45 gay men and 23 bags of luggage for a 3 day trip. To summarise the looks: Erika was wearing a sexy, red, latex top which made her look like a cherry flavoured condom in a blonde wig. Rinna wore some lingerie under a massive trench coat and the others wore clothes that I'm sure were worth more than my house but I was honestly too bored to care, especially with all the Khloe & Tristan TEA!
After their boring boat ride were nothing happened at all, Erika took the ladies to a very exclusive restaurant that was hidden behind a dark alley way that made the Housewives pretend they were all going to be raped. First of all the alley wasn't that bad and second, they clearly had massive production lights and a team of people with them, so being scared of walking down the street was an annoying act. During the dinner at the hidden restaurant the ladies continued to give Erika a rim job about her latex costume while she checked Teddi for her pretend amnesia comment a few episodes back.
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The Real Housewives of Beverly Hills airs Tuesday nights at 9pm/8c on Bravo! For International TV Listings, click here!
Photo Credit: Bravo
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