Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author (Good Tea), and they do not reflect in any way those of iRealHousewives.com.
This may seem like a crazy night for you regular folks, but for the SURvers, this is just a Wednesday. When the girls heard the recording they all came together and came up with a girls run the world mentality. Finally, they've stopped fighting with each other and taken on the real enemy - the men in their lives.
In the infamous recording Jax apparently said that he doesn't find Brittany attractive anymore, he doesn't want to have kids or marry her and that they haven't had sex in months. How the fuck do you move on from that? This asshole fucked your friend and then talked shit about you to her and you STILL won't break up with him? I know Brittany loves him but Jax is asking to be broken up with at this point. I don't think he has the balls to actually end it, so he's doing everything he can to try and get her to break up with him. Ugh he makes me so mad. Over in the Maloney-Schwartz apartment, the men were all brooding over how Ariana and Lala shouldn't have showed Brittany when she was drunk. WHO CARES?! Maybe Jax shouldn't have said disgusting things about his girlfriend and there would be no reason to even have this conversation.
For some reason Sandoval felt the need to yell at his girlfriend for showing Brittany the recording which is the dumbest fight ever. Obviously he is just mad at about their sexless relationship and is taking his anger out in other ways. I'm waiting for his cheating scandal to come out because he's basically the only guy left on the show that hasn't put his tongue in a different girl's mouth - this season.
After the epic housewarming party, James carried the tea back to LVP who was orgasming at the thought of how high her ratings would go. DJ James Kennedy is also taking over every second Tuesday at Sur and called the event "See You Next Tuesday." I think James is a gross human being but that is a smart name, good job White Kanye! He also confirmed that he got the recording off Faith's phone, so I guess we can thank him for most of the drama in this episode.
The morning after also consisted of Jax and Sandoval yelling at their girlfriends when they themselves were in the wrong. This show is making me lose faith in the male species at this point. Jax was literally yelling at Brittany for broadcasting their drama in front of the entire party. Could he be more for a CUNT?! Someone so disgusting and gross doesn't deserve privacy or kindness because he doesn't give it to anyone else. Can we please vote that inflated thumb off the show? Jax also told her to take responsibility for her actions which made me laugh out loud. Sandoval was still made at Ariana for showing Brittany the recording. Ugh these men are the worst.
Everyone is still pretending to work at Sur and now there is a transgender girl who was telling Lala her story, are we supposed to care? I didn't pay any attention to their conversation but I guess she's going to be on the show now. At least we finally have an LGBT character on this show beside the two Toms. DJ James Kennedy, Lala and Sandoval all recorded new music and Tom played his trumpet like he was strangling cats but I can't be bothered writing a whole new paragraph about that filler scene.
Stassi's grown up boyfriend Patrick was back for a double date with the Maloney-Schwartz's and I still don't like him. The gang were telling him about their problems lately and you can tell that him and his man bun think they are stupid and immature, which they are, but that's what makes them so great. It's like watching a bunch of horny toddlers in adults bodies. I can't believe Stassi chased Patrick for so long because he's really not that impressive. Also, why were Kristen and Carter not at this dinner? I feel like they are slowly taking Kristen off the show and that is not acceptable. She needs to get engaged to try and save her place on the show.
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Photo Credit: Bravo
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