Monday, July 24, 2017

The Real Housewives Of Auckland Season 1: The Top 5 Moments From The U.S. Premiere Episode!

The Real Housewives of Auckland finally invaded America this past weekend! Even though I already covered the first season of when it first aired, last year on Bravo New Zealand - I'm going to cover it once again for all the U.S. audiences. If you want to check all the messy drama that went down before, during, and after the first season, CLICK HERE. Warning: It contains many spoilers, so it's up to you if you want to check it out.

So before I begin, instead of doing a regular recap, I'm going to cover my top 5 favorite moments from each episode, which will make it easier to read, getting straight to the point. Remember these are MY top 5 favorite or memorial moments. You may not necessary agree on them,  but let's just agree to disagree, shall we? That being said let's dive into episode 1 of RHOAKL titled "Model Behavior!"

PS: I haven't done a recap in YEARS so be nice to me

5. Taglines

I'm glad that Matchbox Pictures, the producers of the show who are also behind The Real Housewives of Melbourne and The Real Housewives of Sydney made a beautiful opening intro, it looks glamours, fashionable and EXPENSIVE, which it should (unlike The Real Housewives Of Cheshire, which sadly looks cheaply made). I'm going to rank the taglines from least to fav, lets go:

Michelle Blanchard: "I used to strut my stuff on the catwalk but now I'm a model housewife" - Cute, but not sassy enough! and we know Michelle brings it!

Angela Stone: "My name may be stone but everything I touch turns to gold" - Cute

Julia Sloane: "If people are talking behind your back, then you're the one in front" - Okay!

Gilda Kirkpatrick: "I never start a fight I can't win" - She giving us a hint at what's to come!

Anne Batley Burton: "I'm like a fine champagne, I bubble, I fizz and I'm the life of the party" - Describes Anne to a tea, well said Champagne Lady!

Louise Wallace: "I made my money the old fashioned way, I inherited it" - I LOVE IT! Keeping it real and rich! Does it sound somewhat pretentious? Yes! But hello - it is the Housewives franchise that we're talking about, at least she's being honest!



4. The Champagne Lady Who Rescues Pussies!

Anne Batley Burton, who is known as The Champagne Lady takes her love for cats to a whole new level. She has LOTS and LOTS of cats, as she rescues them and even has a few kennels at her property, where she lives with her husband and her staff. Anne is definitely giving me Lisa Vanderpump RHOBH Season 1 vibes, cheeky, funny and joyful to watch. Always craking jokes while throwing some undercover shade at times. She loves to party, and believes she used to be a cat in her previous life. MEOW!

3. The Fashion Stylist Who Won't Shut Up!

Louise Wallance invites Gilda Kirkpatrick, a socialite, mother-of-two, who owns her own marketing/ad agency, Julia Sloane, who owns her own winery with her husband who she recently married and fashion stylist Angela Stone, a fashion stylist who splits her time between Christchurch and Auckland.


Louise starts off throwing shade by warns us that Angela is "like a ship in full sail". "And she wears cream a lot, so she does look like a sail! She's not overweight, but she's a big unit." Meanwhile, Angela arrives with gifts: giving the ladies her book The Style Guide, which none of the ladies want. Angela says she is helping women express themselves through their clothing. Angela starts talking about her career and doesn't seem to let the other ladies get a word in.

2. Angela vs. Gilda

During the fashion show, it's clear that these two don't seem to get along, and most likely won't. As Angela continues to talk about herself, and reveals that she aspires to be New Zealand's version of Oprah.Gilda takes the opportunity the give Ang some advice while throwing some shade in between. Basically, telling her to listen more and talk less about herself, (which most of the ladies at the table agree) but clearly Angela, with her smile ala Karent Sierra from Real Housewives of Miami tells her thank you, she will, when in reality we all know she wants to shut her down

1. The "Plus Size" Birthday Dinner from Hell!

Close to the end of the episode, the ladies get together to celebrate Julia Sloane's birthday. Julia, who owns believes that having beauty and fashion appointments is a a full-time job. Gilda brings her bestie Michelle Blanchard, a former British fashion model along for the wild ride.

Learning that Angela models after talking to her within two minutes in, Michelle says, "You still model? Plus size, or…"

Angela rapidly, says with a Karent Sierra smile on her face says, "No, not at all."

In her confessional interview, Angela says that plus-size models are size 16 and up, and she is not that large, before exclaiming, "Who actually cares, anyway?"

Anne is mortified. "For god's sake, why would you say that?"

Gilda looks amused, and Julia is annoyed that she is not the center of attention at her birthday party: "No-one is focused on me. Hello, it's my birthday."

"I used to model," says Julia, attempting to win back the spotlight.

"Oh, my god, did you?" says Michelle. Then, Angela starts to cry and heads outside onto the deck, pursued by Julia and Louise. "She probably looked at you and thought holy crap," Louise tells Angela. "You're beautiful."

Inside, the other ladies start to guess what made Angela get so emotional.

"Maybe it's that time of the month," says Gilda.

After Louise and Julia comfort Angela, they return inside the restaurant. Then, Michelle asked Angela if her comment made her cry, in which Angela admits yes.


But Michelle, defends her comment by telling her: "Sweetie, with tits like that you're not a normal-sized model. Get over it." And then: "Seriously, don't say I offended you in any way, shape or form because I have been quite calm. I've already heard about you from Gilda, so I kind of knew what to expect, but the tears thing? Honestly, is that a performance? What was that?"

Louise tries to defuse the situation by suggesting that Michelle didn't mean to offend, but at this time no on seems to care or listen as Angela goes after Gilda, calling her disrespectful and "disgusting" for not standing up and greeting her when they first meet at the fashion show

Meanwhile, the episode ends with wise words from the Champagne Lady who rescues pussies (her words, not mine). "Who would ever want a birthday like that? It's got to be the birthday from hell."

What were your thoughts on the first episode of The Real Housewives of Auckland? Sound off in the comments below!

The Real Housewives of Auckland Season 1 airs Saturdays at 12pm/11c only on Bravo. For International #RealHousewives TV Listings, click here!

Photo Credit: Bravo

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