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Recap: RHOC Season 9 - Episode 10: Skunk In The Barnyard

by: Joshua Pramuk

After last weeks make up session between Heather and Tamra I know that a storm is coming! Hold on to your designer bags and Jimmy Choos because after Tamra threw Shannon to the ice queen... all bets are off!

Shannon, Tamra is the last person you need advice from! By all means honey let her look you in your eyes and lie to your face! Shannon is going through a lot, she's crying about the marriage with David. Tamra has no heart, no emotional response to a friend spilling out her heart! Friend too strong of a word right? Shannon feels like she's acting like a moron. Well gurl, Ab-so-loutely!!. Shannon gets a text from David saying 'Heather 'Champs' Dubrow was at a lunch discussing the E-mail.' Now this E-mail was about David moving out. The only person Shannon told was Tammy Loose Lips, TrashMouth. Yet in her confessional, Tamra, says she didn't tell anyone. Then who did Heather hear it from? Alexis?  I'm SURE you keep in touch with her.  Right Tamra? BTW Miss Brainiac that's a rhetorical question. What am I saying? Tamra knowing what rhetorical question is?!?

Shannon wants to know if Tamra told anyone. Tamra denies, denies, denies. Don't trust a blond with so much botox, her eyes are starting to look like Julie Chen's! Maybe Jujubee's? Which ever you prefer! Vicki is calling Brooks after just getting home. Vicki is a breath of fresh air this season. Her and Brooks though, that I can't get behind. Shannon is at home and David is there. I understand why Shannon wants to work it out for her kids. At the same time I say this Shannon and David…your relationship is falling apart. It's painful to watch. If only Dr. V could get y'all to try changing the game?? #SwingersByBravo

Okaaaarrr!! Shannon is going to confront Heather at her own home! Bad idea, very bad idea! Heather is telling Terry that Tamra (EvilBitchMonsterOfDeath) and Eddie want to take them out to dinner. Terry says 'That's the Tamra we know and love' Good luck with that! Tamra loves her immobile face more than anyone. Heather says 'The point is you have to be my friend. ' ughhh. Now Shannon arrives at Heather's amazing mansion. So Heather is like cutting to the chase.  Shannon brings up the email! Commerical. Damn you Bravo. So we are back with my Hornsby Hard Cider in hand. Shannon needs to find out why the E-mail got out 'for her kids.' Shannon, it's not about the kids, it's about your pride or lack thereof. Heather says 'I'm confused by this.' Well of course you are, she's coming to after attacking you??? In what world does that make sense? #PlanetShannon

Heather basically tells Shannon when I saw you at the door I thought 'OMG she's here to apologize.' Shannon doesn't feel she owes Heather an apology, #lesbihonest people, she does! Shannon brings up 'pick a side' It's not that serious Shannon. Scary Angry Shannon is back people. Heather let's Shannon know what she told Tamra was 'pick a lane.' Meaning, don't just be my friend when you are around me. Be my friend all the time, or NOT AT ALL. Tamra really has friendship issues my GAWWWD! Shannon will not ever hear Heather out. This is not the Shannon Show honey! Heather reveals that Tamra told her that Shannon's marriage is falling apart and that she drinks to much. Shannon says that's ridiculous meanwhile taking a large gulp of her strong vodka soda! Shannon on Celebrity Rehab coming soon...  I'll keep you posted.

Shannon is losing it and going off on Heather in her own house! That bitch would be wearing that vodka soda. Heather never gave up Tamara's name while Shannon is trying to draw it out of her. 'It's weird to me you are asking me these questions!'- Heather Dubrow. 'Because you are mother. 'I am a mother, who YOU think is a liar, scolds people, and is RUDE!' The truth hurts doesn't it Shannon? Shannon, take a hint! 'Thanks for stopping by.' Doesn't mean, Oh yes please continue bashing in me IN MY HOME! Heather just destroyed Shannon with her wits and intelligence. 'Tell me again what I am. Please, make it worse… you know what, my children are in the house. We're DONE! Please leave, I am asking you to leave!' Shannon girl don't cry, you were just kicked off a mansion, I think that'd be the highlight of my life. Shannon is driving home and she calls David crying about being asked to leave. It's really not like she kicked her out. She asked her to leave, plain and simple. Shannon, now who's twisting it around? Hmm, pot meet kettle.

Vicki and Crooks! While I really am enjoying Vicki this season, she could do betta! I love the fact Vicki says she won't get married again because once a man stops making her happy, She’s done. Hopefully Crooks will start making her cry soon! So Tamra and Eddie receive one of those weird robot babies whom looks exactly like Baby Troy. This is such a fake storyline, I'm over it! Tamra we know you really don't want kids. Buy yourself a big, big bag of weed and mellow out. That will never happen though, your drug of choice is Tamra. The baby starts crying and Tamra can't get it to stop so she hands it to her bike riding husband. Eddie then blows my mind, he lets the robot baby suck on his nipple and it stops crying! To bad robot babies don't bite huh Eddie? (wink )

Shannon has invited Lizzie and Danielle over. They are doing oil healistics. Lizzie's dress works really nice with her skin tone. Love it Lizzie! They are trying the happy oils and Shannon says according to Mrs. Dubrow I'm a sad person. Liar alert, liar alert. Heather never called you sad Shannon. Let's face it though, you are as sad as Lassie when she never found Timmy in that well! #BloodBath is what Shannon called the fight with Heather, I call it Redemption!!! Right Ariana? Lizzie the truth teller, 'You can't rip Heather apart for being who she is, that's just who she is. Accept it or move on.' Shannon tells Lizzie and Danielle THAT HEATHER said she had a drinking problem! This is fucking rich! Welcome to Shannon's perception of reality. She obviously lives on the river De-Nial. Own it Shannon. No one likes a hypocrite!! More lies Shannon???  'Then she said my children are here. Zip it! GET OUT!' This bitch is unstable, someone call Oprah. If she can help Lindsey, she can help Shannon… I think. Lizzie understands Heather, because she knows how Heather is. Shannon go see Tamra! Really loved the shade from Lizzie. Danielle wants with you coming for Shannon gurrl?

Vicki and Brooks massages! AHHHHHH! NO Girth Brooks is back! I just saw vag and Crooks crack. I'm blind!! So please someone buy me a seeing eye dog. Tamra is going to dinner with Shannon, she's getting a good karma Margarita. She needs it. I bet that server brings her a bad Karma Margarita instead!  Meanwhile Heather looking like the bad ass she is in a blood red dress and Dr. Dubrow are meeting Lizzie for dinner. Interesting!

Shannon looks like she is on a mission walking info this restaurant she's ready for ANYTHING! Tamra feels horrible that she said something to Heather. Heather is telling Lizzie that she was told about an email but didn't know the details. Yet, she went to lunch and said she knows Shannon is in a bad place. Some girls she isn't really friends with started gossiping about what THEY'VE heard about Shannon's marriage. I'm with Lizzie, I don't agree but I'm sticking by Heather! Shannon is disappointed in Tamra but she's not mad at Tamra! Really???

Looks like #LizzieAndHeathervsTamraAndShannon isn't too far around the corner.  Brunettes are smarter you know?! Once again Shannon says Heather said get out! I can't deal. Lizzie is sticking by Heather's side. Heather actually sent a nice text after the fight and Shannon never replied! Shannon is telling Tamra that she didn't get aggressive with Heather. No Shannon, you were just peachy the whole time.

Next week it looks like more bullshit from Shannon. Well till next week!

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The Real Housewives of Orange County airs Monday nights at 9/8c only on Bravo!

Photo Credit: Bravo