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RHONY Recap: Scary Island, a Redux?

Hello everyone!! My name is Gabriel aka Mr. Housewife! As you may all know, I love the Real Housewives!! My favorite, of course, are the ladies of NY. I will now be providing recaps for the housewives episodes for my twin @iRealHousewives, yeeey! Hope you all take a moment of your time and read them! I hope I don’t offend anyone with any humor I may use! I have a dry sense of humor so sometimes it might seem like I am not kidding but I really am! J Follow me at @bravo_rhony for live tweeting for all housewives shows and episode recaps! J Love you all! Remember, dream big and live large (lesson I learned from Real Housewives) ;)

On Monday night’s episode, the New York ladies pack their luggage and set off to St. Barths! The much anticipated episode has finally arrived and what better way to start the trip than with a glass of wine and champagne. First off, I have to say that the scenery for St. Barth’s is astonishing! The view, the houses, and even Mother Nature really stand out! Villa Oasis is to die for! We get to see the mansion the ladies are staying in, it's rooms and it’s temple like features! We soon learn that Ramona and Sonja plan to stay in the master suite room for some drunk topless time! Aside from Carole’s questionable boots (lol), she did everything perfectly for these ladies! Everything about the mansion was perfect! Even its glass slider doors that led Heather to crash right into one! Aside from the sexual humor and slapstick comedy, the ladies got along for only half of the day until the toaster oven from hell made a comeback.  Sonja, Ramona, and Heather argue over the toaster oven and how things went down the day of shooting. Obviously, the ladies are still adamant in their views and will hash it out in the reunion. The best thing to do is agree to disagree, for now, until someone gets ganged up on anyway. We finally meet the famous Russ, Carole’s boyfriend. After an overextended awkward welcome from Ramona, Sonja lets Russ know that she is just ‘an American girl.’ Hilarious! Luckily, Luann has a bright idea and pulls the drunkies for some coffee to sober up.

The pirate show, my god the pirate show! These ladies know how to party! I can definitely get on board with that! It is here where we meet the long lost twin of Johnny Depp and Jack Sparrow, Thomas. He offered the ladies a spot on their nightly show as pirates who dance on the tables apparently. It was all in good fun and I am glad the ladies know how to have fun! Things take a turn for the worst when Luann is heard saying she wants special treatment. Does she not know the microphone is still recording? She sounded like such an egomaniac saying things like “I am not just any pirate woman. I want to be special. I am an Indian, don’t fuck with me.” Um really? Wow. We are then informed by practically all the ladies that they heard a French man with Luann at 3am. She wakes and recites that she was with her Italian friends the night before.. She makes sure to let everyone know that she was with them and she is sticking to her alibi. Not knowing that she has microphones at all hours of the day, she is recorded speaking to someone on the phone in French warning them not to disclose that Thomas was with her the night before. Uh oh Countess looks like trouble.  Carole and Heather speak to our dear Aviva and she notifies them that she is coming to St. Barths with Reid. Spreading the news to the ladies, not everyone receives it well. A LADIES trip is taken literal in NY so Ramona and Sonja have a problem with a male in the house.  On next week’s episode, it looks like Ramona and Sonja go up against Aviva and battle out the issue.