Monday, May 7, 2018

RHOP Recap: I Came From Jesus [Episode 6]

by: Sam Allan from Good Tea
Disclaimer: The opinions expressed in this article are those of the author (Good Tea), and they do not reflect in any way those of iRealHousewives.com.

These Maryland ladies are bringing it this season and it doesn't look like their shady antics and petty one liners will be slowing down anytime soon, especially with their new primetime timeslot at 8 pm on Sunday.

Every cast (even Robyn) brings there own special dynamic to the show and serves a purpose. Obviously, there is some kind of stigma around the newer Housewives shows but those are the shows which are delivering constant and fun drama while the older franchises are getting dried up and crusty. Potomac and Dallas are the future Y'all!

Someone had the bright idea to film grown women run around in a cylinder of ice and attend cryotherapy, which isn't fun or exhilarating to watch. Little Miss Ashley and her fro decided they wanted to be Mother Teresa for a few days and announced her plan at cryotherapy to take a trip away and bring all seven of the ladies together, which shocked Charrisse because she realised the young pretty cheerleader was coming to snatch her cherry blossom. I like Mrs Jackson-(Maybe) Jordan but Candaice did snatch her place as a Housewife. Speaking of Charrise and her nasal voice, when the topic of Candiace's finances was brought up (again), she decided to throw more petty shade at the new girl and ask if her mom even bought her engagement ring. Yes, it was a passive aggressive joke but Gizelle, Charrisse and partially Robyn, all have a tendency to come hard at the new girls but get offended when the new girls go hard back at them.

At the cryotherapy Candaice and her weave sat still and contained the anger that was billowing out of her head after the passive aggressive moment but Monique (and some behind the scenes producers) definitely helped fuel the shady fire and got the newbie riled up about Charrisse's fun shade during a fashion day where the three spring chickens: Ashley, Monique & Candaice showed off their slim figures and popping bods. Can you imagine having the name Charrisse? Sure it may be fun to say but I've written it in six recaps now and I doesn't get any easier to type, neither does Candaice with her irregular spelling.

After Monique got into a confusing crash caused by her falling asleep in her car due to an (alleged) martini binge, the ladies loaded into Ashley's camping fun bus that didn't come equipped with a strippers pole. If it doesn't have a pole is it even a fun bus? While aboard, a turnt Candiace and Charrisse started going at it again because the cheerleader decided to speak up about the shade that was thrown days earlier about her engagement ring and declared that Charrisse had a shady bitch moment. Miss Pageant should have clapped back at the comment when it first happened but obviously didn't feel some kind of way about it until others go in her ear. Of course, the demoted "friend" grabbed her opportunity for a fight and relevance and used it to suggest that Candiace was calling her a bitch? Ugh, I hate it when these Housewives take a sentence out of context and make it mean something they know it was never meant to.

Shady comments ensued but all I could think was: who cares about where these women get their money? I don't understand the obsession with wealth and possessions amongst a group of women that have neither. Monique is obviously the most coin heavy Housewife (have you seen her house compared to the others?) so if she can stay out of other people's finances then everyone else should - especially Gizelle who's income is mainly derived from her Bravo paycheck and child support which comes from the congregation of her cheating ex. Stay out of other people's finances if you don't want yours talked. Wow, that was shady but I've had little sleep and I'm fresh out of fucks to give.


The Real Housewives of Potomac airs Sunday nights at 8pm/7c on Bravo! For International TV Listings, click here!

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Photo Credit: Bravo

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